In _____ we trust.

It takes a lot to blindly trust someone. It's either an act of incredible bravery...or stupidity. So much is on the line for me. I let it all hang out, heart on my sleeve. No matter how hard I fight it, I can't hide myself. The "real me" loves to peek her little head out at the most inconvenient times, but I've grown accustomed to it. Live your life the best way you know how. Sometimes that means you're opening the door for trouble, but anything worthwhile is worth at least a bit of struggle and strife. Anything meaningful must be earned. At what price? Steep, I'm sure. I'd wager a heart and a soul. Sounds about right.

If I look back, I can't complain about too much. I have two best friends that mean the world to me. For that alone I consider myself to be a wealthy woman. Hopefully I can reflect upon this in days to come and remember that it could always be worse.

It's not just a river in Egypt.

So there it is. I've laid it all on the line and it's coming back to bite me in the ass. It would be so easy to say that I should have seen this happening, but when you put so much of your heart into it, how can you really give up? Is this what it feels like to fight a losing battle? Being able to determine whether I should push on the gas or hit the brakes is proving to be much more difficult that I thought. What happened to good, old fashioned "boy meets girl"? When did everything become so complicated? I've reached a plateau where I know I'm in denial. I should realize that it's inevitable, and let it breeze by. I really should.

I can't.